So I blogged about Internet Dating a while back, and I
thought it was about the right time to post about it again. I've been on one
particular site for a while now and find it a brilliant source of
entertainment. I know this isn't the idea of it, but most of the messages I get
off men are like a dating 101 of things not to do!!
So, I thought I’d post down the funniest messages I have
received over the past couple of months, in hope that it will make you laugh,
and may also help some men with their internet dating style. (If you are
reading this and sent me one of these messages then I thank you, you made me
laugh A LOT!!!!)
This was the first message I received upon joining the
website.
“If I give you £50
will you let me suck your toes?”
I think you will all agree with my choice of NOT replying to
this message, especially when his profile picture was a picture of him wearing
pants and fishnet tights. Although I really did want to write him a little
message to say “This is probably why you are single!”
“Hi, so I just moved into my flat and I need a girl to come
round and just clean up and look after me, you start immediately. Please bring
a mop.”
This one is my all time favourite. I once again did not
reply, as I knew that it would lead to an argument and would end with me
telling him where to shove his mop!
“Do you find me attractive?”
This was after 3 messages, where I started to think that
this boy thought I was his actual Girlfriend. He kept saying “We” when he
talked about future plans, for example he asked me if I liked football I said
“Yes but I wouldn't watch it by myself” and he said “I have loads of friends we
can watch it with!" Boys just a little heads up asking a girl you have never met
if she finds you attractive is not only awkward it’s embarrassing, don’t do
it!
“Hey, how you doin’
beautiful?"
Joey is that you??? My reply to this was “Friends called –
they want their catchphrase back!” (And that is probably why I am single!)
“Hi, I’m looking for
serious relation can we know you?”
THIS ONE MADE ME HOWL WITH LAUGHTER! I laugh every time I
re-read it! He followed this message up with “Will you be my wife?”
Brilliant!!!
“That face in the last picture is the one I want to make you
do.”
I was a bit concerned about what face he was referring too,
so quickly scanned my pictures. In the picture he was referring too I was
smiling, so I was left really confused as to why this picture had such a seedy
tone to it!
“I just want to ask your advice on circumcision, I’m thinking
of getting it done but don’t know what women think about it.”
I had no words for this one. This guy looked at my profile,
looked at my picture and thought – this looks like a girl who knows a thing or
two about circumcision. I thought about googling it and sending him a link but
then I thought better of it.
So you can see that Online dating has some entertainment, I
still don’t think it’s for me but while I’m still a member of this site and
still getting hilarious messages I will continue sharing them with you lovely
ladies!
Let me know if you have had any funnier messages!
Love
J
xx
